humour – Dimples Migraines and Aahs

Sourced from booksandwineke on Instagram

There’s something about an author’s first. Maybe like we go in on our first love, at least from what I have seen in movies. We go in deep, love relentlessly, give in to the tide, and be swept away by the waves, steady, thrilling, memorable, and that first may not be replicated. There will be others but they will never be the first. The first lingers, the first is ebbed in your memory, the first is almost sacred the first…

I pondered over whether Brit was male or female. Being in the 21st Century, I expanded my thinking into what pronoun Brit goes by. Ever since badonpaper podcast shit on how men write romance and lovemaking of a female character, I tend to attribute well-written love-making scenes to female authors. This book has those, very descriptive, nothing out of the ordinary, and in those lines, I was inclined to think Brit is Female but I was not ready for that confirmation.

This book will do you well .. it was a page-turner for me and I am shy of declaring it my best book of the year while I still relish in its high. I know I have written highly of City of girls and yes I thoroughly enjoyed my reading of it and I would say the same about The Mothers.

The Mothers rightfully take the mantle because it is a short easy read. The satire flows and the humor in between the lines are the caliber of Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine. If you enjoyed Eleanor Oliphant you will relish this. The characters and the theme are very relatable. Do note that there is a suicide trigger and an abortion trigger.

Before we were wives and mothers, we were girls and we loved ain’t shit men. The type of man our brothers warned us about because he was going nowhere and he would treat us bad on the way to that nowhere… A tragic woman hooks into an ain’t shit man or worse lets him hook into her. He will drag her until he tires. He will climb atop her shoulders and her body will sag from the weight of loving him.

It’s usually a gapping moment when an ain’t shit man brings the A-game in his next relationship. Some wait for the shoe to fall and at times it does while on other occasions the ain’t shit man continues the act or for those who believe, he changes for the better.

Most of the milestones in a woman’s life were accompanied by pain, like her first time having sex or birthing a child. For men, it was all orgasms and champagne.

The experiences in women’s lives are characterized by pain. Right from the monthly periods, as if it is not enough some have to go through it in severe pain. It is worse for women diagnosed with endometriosis and if you think surely it should only get better from here there’s the unfortunate lot that experiences painful sex not to mention no orgasm afterward and adding onto that the birthing process!

After a secret has been told everyone becomes a prophet

Everyone claims to have known.. each person picks a scenario and labels it the telltale sign for them. You wonder why they never shared their prophetic moment with the masses so that we can confirm the prophecy. Are we short of Isaiah’s in our midst who long before openly and without a shadow of doubt spoke about the birth of a Messiah in the town of David and everyone must have laughed it off …never quick to believe.

The topics addressed in this book are heavy. We learn about a girl who is left by her mother and another who leaves her mother. One who dreads having a child and another who is struggling to have one. Choices and how once made they determine the life we lead. The different ways the same boy loves; one was always a secret and another paraded as the acceptable one. The depiction of society has never been clearer. The characters Nadia Turner and Audrey and everything Brit Bennet covered in 356 pages are worth your time. I am looking forward to another book by her.

The characters were well thought of. While reading I thought, I hoped, I pitied Luke but I could not blame Nadia. I marveled at how Shaddie stood a chance, I felt that Luke might have a second chance. I liked the growth of the characters and how plot twists were just thrown at us and I had to reread the line as if the author had moved from the script. This would make a great movie because the story ought to be read or watched by many.

I have actively postponed writing this piece until it is the only option left. I do want to share what I read but it hurts knowing that I cannot read as much this year. Actually, I am reading more this year just towards the academic side. 2020 was great fodder for books. I thought I would make it to 40 books but I went slightly over 30. By end of January, I was already 6 books in unlike now when I only manage one book a month.

My notable reads of 2020 in no particular order are: Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert, Eleanor Oliphant is completely fine by Gail Honeyman, Second Class Citizen by Buchi Emecheta, the Letters of Vincent van Gogh and Girl, Woman Other by Bernardine Evaristo.

I would highly recommend each of the above books if taste was not a limiting factor. I know of people who read Big Magic at the beginning of every year for that creative push. My podcast book club; bad on paper had it as the January read this year.

Eleanor Oliphant is not completely fine. She is very reserved, lonely I would say; hardly has any friends, drinks so as not to think or feel, she is literally a passerby in the world. The book was very well written. It was a page turner of sorts. Plenty of vocabulary considering Eleanor does crossword everyday. I adopted this habit for about a month after finishing the book. I used to do it in High school but now having several entertainment options, the habit quickly dwindled.

Second Class Citizen was a one night stand; fast, pleasurable, met expectations, and left a lingering taste. It is set up in Nigeria and the UK during the colonial times. It describes in great detail the life then, the hurdles and how the characters transformed. It is very much character driven and fast paced.

Hardly is an African man portrayed as lazy but this one really held the forte. To some extent, the man feared success! He did not strive for it, he did not welcome it, he was too comfortable being average and fortunately, the wife had enough ambition for the both of them.

I am so passionate about the story that I have to restrain myself from giving too much detail. Did I mention that the book has my lucky star, humour!! There is lots of it and it is very relatable on an African perspective. This book really depicts hard work, a mother’s sacrifice for her kin and navigating the African home. There is this incident in the book when the woman (I forget her name) was going to give birth. She chose the midwife option because it was less costly and the Government gave stipends to those who chose that method and as such, she could better manage the family’s scarce resources.

Fortunately, the circumstances would not allow her to go through with it and the opportunity was a blessing in disguise. She got well looked after in the maternity ward, got to see other couple’s interaction and how different the situation was for her. It made her strive for better and the next opportunity she had, she did not wait for the best to be done because she knew it would not be done given the man she married. Nonetheless, she did it for herself and quite crafty!

I am inclined to think men are the ones who chase women because females can easily adapt. The males present us with an offer and we choose whether to take it or leave. Most of the time women compromise and decide to simply get by. Reminds me of this meme that stated:

if all the men your girlfriend loved were on a lineup and she was asked to pick the love of her life, would she pick you? Better yet, would you be in the lineup?

Men always go for women out of their league but most women accept men far below their league. This is exactly what was portrayed in the book and what I see in everyday life. To curb this, my mantra this year is:

show me how you love yourself and I will decide if that is how I want to be loved.

Two places I will try not to go is back and forth or out of my way. The woman in the book really paced around but as all other females, once she was done, she was DONE!!!! I know I have given away too much but you should really read the book.

My interest in reading Letters of Vincent Van Gogh was piqued after watching a documentary about his life. Ever since, I have been talking about him and giving his life experiences, one would think in another life we were buddies and I got to experience him firsthand. The book really instills the importance of loving and to be loved; I dare say it is the greatest thing one can achieve, it will fulfill you and shows in all other areas of your life. Van Gogh had a rough time attaining that and he advised, that one should love many things at least then, one of the many will not disappoint.

Haruki Murakami’s Norwegian Wood deserves a mention. This was the saddest book I have ever read. Suicide seems to be theme; characters are perpetually sad and they commit suicide. There should be a disclaimer before picking up the book that you need to be in a better place in your life otherwise their sadness will engulf you. Funny enough I enjoyed reading the book. It had weird characters and I loved that. Their everyday lives were just that; everyday lives. The book was well written and I loved the discussion I had in my book club about the book.

Girl, woman, other is a special book

the writing is similar to what I have going on in this paragraph

commas and full stops are a myth and it seems like the author had a long list of names that she was dying to feature and decided to use all of them in that book at once

you will have one sentence or even a word appearing in a page then the book goes back and forth ties the begining to the end and you were somehow lost in between

most people struggle through it and I am one of those but once the book gets to you it is a fast page turner

my first attempt with it only got me through the 1st chapter of character 1 not of the book I attended a book club discussion on it and resolved to make another attempt because those who went through it had so much to say and I could not be left out

Well, which of the 6 have you been convinced to pick up?

Tag: humour

The Mothers by Brit Bennet

My 2020 Reading Feast