Author: mashkiz

I tell stories. Some through my pen, others by word of mouth. Some are enclosed never to be read by anyone, others are delivered to individuals and most are posted online.
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My 2020 Reading Feast

I have actively postponed writing this piece until it is the only option left. I do want to share what I read but it hurts knowing that I cannot read as much this year. Actually, I am reading more this year just towards the academic side. 2020 was great fodder for books. I thought I would make it to 40 books but I went slightly over 30. By end of January, I was already 6 books in unlike now when I only manage one book a month.

My notable reads of 2020 in no particular order are: Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert, Eleanor Oliphant is completely fine by Gail Honeyman, Second Class Citizen by Buchi Emecheta, the Letters of Vincent van Gogh and Girl, Woman Other by Bernardine Evaristo.

I would highly recommend each of the above books if taste was not a limiting factor. I know of people who read Big Magic at the beginning of every year for that creative push. My podcast book club; bad on paper had it as the January read this year.

Eleanor Oliphant is not completely fine. She is very reserved, lonely I would say; hardly has any friends, drinks so as not to think or feel, she is literally a passerby in the world. The book was very well written. It was a page turner of sorts. Plenty of vocabulary considering Eleanor does crossword everyday. I adopted this habit for about a month after finishing the book. I used to do it in High school but now having several entertainment options, the habit quickly dwindled.

Second Class Citizen was a one night stand; fast, pleasurable, met expectations, and left a lingering taste. It is set up in Nigeria and the UK during the colonial times. It describes in great detail the life then, the hurdles and how the characters transformed. It is very much character driven and fast paced.

Hardly is an African man portrayed as lazy but this one really held the forte. To some extent, the man feared success! He did not strive for it, he did not welcome it, he was too comfortable being average and fortunately, the wife had enough ambition for the both of them.

I am so passionate about the story that I have to restrain myself from giving too much detail. Did I mention that the book has my lucky star, humour!! There is lots of it and it is very relatable on an African perspective. This book really depicts hard work, a mother’s sacrifice for her kin and navigating the African home. There is this incident in the book when the woman (I forget her name) was going to give birth. She chose the midwife option because it was less costly and the Government gave stipends to those who chose that method and as such, she could better manage the family’s scarce resources.

Fortunately, the circumstances would not allow her to go through with it and the opportunity was a blessing in disguise. She got well looked after in the maternity ward, got to see other couple’s interaction and how different the situation was for her. It made her strive for better and the next opportunity she had, she did not wait for the best to be done because she knew it would not be done given the man she married. Nonetheless, she did it for herself and quite crafty!

I am inclined to think men are the ones who chase women because females can easily adapt. The males present us with an offer and we choose whether to take it or leave. Most of the time women compromise and decide to simply get by. Reminds me of this meme that stated:

if all the men your girlfriend loved were on a lineup and she was asked to pick the love of her life, would she pick you? Better yet, would you be in the lineup?

Men always go for women out of their league but most women accept men far below their league. This is exactly what was portrayed in the book and what I see in everyday life. To curb this, my mantra this year is:

show me how you love yourself and I will decide if that is how I want to be loved.

Two places I will try not to go is back and forth or out of my way. The woman in the book really paced around but as all other females, once she was done, she was DONE!!!! I know I have given away too much but you should really read the book.

My interest in reading Letters of Vincent Van Gogh was piqued after watching a documentary about his life. Ever since, I have been talking about him and giving his life experiences, one would think in another life we were buddies and I got to experience him firsthand. The book really instills the importance of loving and to be loved; I dare say it is the greatest thing one can achieve, it will fulfill you and shows in all other areas of your life. Van Gogh had a rough time attaining that and he advised, that one should love many things at least then, one of the many will not disappoint.

Haruki Murakami’s Norwegian Wood deserves a mention. This was the saddest book I have ever read. Suicide seems to be theme; characters are perpetually sad and they commit suicide. There should be a disclaimer before picking up the book that you need to be in a better place in your life otherwise their sadness will engulf you. Funny enough I enjoyed reading the book. It had weird characters and I loved that. Their everyday lives were just that; everyday lives. The book was well written and I loved the discussion I had in my book club about the book.

Girl, woman, other is a special book

the writing is similar to what I have going on in this paragraph

commas and full stops are a myth and it seems like the author had a long list of names that she was dying to feature and decided to use all of them in that book at once

you will have one sentence or even a word appearing in a page then the book goes back and forth ties the begining to the end and you were somehow lost in between

most people struggle through it and I am one of those but once the book gets to you it is a fast page turner

my first attempt with it only got me through the 1st chapter of character 1 not of the book I attended a book club discussion on it and resolved to make another attempt because those who went through it had so much to say and I could not be left out

Well, which of the 6 have you been convinced to pick up?

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Money

We might all be slaves
Spinning the wheel of capitalism

The more you make the more your needs
The less you have the more you need

Somehow the scales are tilted and the poor always remain poor because offers are available only to those who spend more.

Somehow the rich are enabled to save, somehow the rich are rewarded for their appearances with opportunity and connections in the right places.

The universe tries a balancing act though. One either has money, beauty or happiness. Those with money say it can buy happiness. Those without beauty say it is only skin deep. I wonder if anyone is truly happy because no one says much about it.

The poor claim money can’t buy happiness but how would they know? Maybe it is because the rich do not portray nuanced happiness.

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The Office

The office is apparently the most streamed series in America in 2020. I have watched enough episodes to bring the concept home. Much of 2020 was adjusting to working from home and working in shifts but currently some work spaces have resumed working from the office. As in every other situation, there were pros and cons. The biggest pro for most was eliminating the commute. Have you walked in this hot sun? It’s worse when you are dressed in a full suit your bag heavy with packed lunch as you try to maneuver the busy streets getting knocked on your shoulder every so often.

Cutting costs on lunch money was also a major pro of working from home. Actually eating at your convenience was more of it not to mention dressing as you pleased. This luxury was more expensive than anyone could have anticipated. Work became round the clock as opposed to the neat 8 – 5. It is no brainer getting that work call at 10pm heck some bosses even send that email at midnight. Here is the reality check that you are no Cinderella, more of Snow White’s seven dwarfs.

After the niceties, oh you have changed! What happened to your hair and all other changes that could not be detected over zoom calls the office gets back to work. HR of course reminds you to sanitize, no sharing of pens and paper, social distancing and minimizing the number of people in a meeting or taking up bigger room. The office experience does not start when you get on the lift to your floor, it starts when Nani picks you up.

There is a lot to say on lunch hours at the office. Some organize lunch that is paid for, others just contract a standard supplier but each employee pays as they eat but the one that sets people apart is those that leave you to fend for yourself. You could carry packed lunch like your pre school days or find a decent place to eat; emphasis on decent. I am wondering whether to get to the different employees you meet at this stage… I shall restrain myself for a few paragraphs.

Lunch time at the office gives me anxiety. I remember the packed lunch I forgot at home on the table and how I have to think of plan B. It’s not only the change of food that I mind, the fact that I had the meal planned and I knew the taste to expect come lunch. We have great food vendors but their prices are over the roof for an intern. I was shook once when I got basic chapo beans at 250!!! This is the holy grail to rate establishment just like tea. Once the price of a cup is over 200 do not bother looking at anything else on the menu if you are on a budget.

My chain of thought was finally flowing on some work I had taken over 2 days with and I did not want to interrupt that with a meal so I looked at my delivery options. I remembered a place we had visited whose fries were 100ksh and they had informed us they do office delivery at no extra cost. Meanwhile the 250 chapo beans still need 20ksh delivery. Being on a budget I made the call.. I kept waiting for my delivery till I assumed they got lost in their way because they had admitted they were not familiar with my location much as they have been serving people around my area since time immemorial.

Finally at 3.30 I get a call that the lady is at the reception. As I walked on the hallway, something told me to use the 4th Floor stairs and peep before presenting myself as the intended recipient of the food but my affirmations side kicked and assured me confidence. I walk out and see the lady carrying a ‘paperbag’. The receptionists with a sneer in her voice remarks ” kumbe ni wewe, nilikua namuambia hakuna mtu hula chakula kama hiyo hapa kwetu ” So rude don’t you think but weeeuh, I was the one in for a shock.

The lady informs me that she needs the bag back.. I look at the contents, it is nothing I imagined!! Butwaa beat me 😆. There I was expecting my food in this transparent tins and next to it two packs of the 5ksh tomato sauce but instead, my eyes were met with a greasy brown bag, heaven knows how clean that bag is as it has been ferrying every other order around and the transparent nylon papers filled with the Jerry can sauce and tied like a ball. Hehe.. I felt like paying for the meal but refusing to walk around with it.

She’s over reacting you think.. huh well, I have not painted the picture of what office lunch my colleagues partake. It’s either pasta and fillet, stir fried rice and Mongolian beef, the aroma just tells you the cook was not trying to make a meal but is one who aims to please. Did I mention they are in glass tins so that they are conducive for micro waving you know, cancer and all, then picture me arriving with my greasy brown bag and toothpicks as forks. If someone brought me my bag I would have left for home and called it a day. In another world, there were employees receiving their greasy brown bags with joy.

“Angalau muache abebe na mfuko mpaka kitchen aweke fries kwa plate“; the receptionist said. The lady agrees and fast I walked. Thank God I could at least make it presentable while there if no one walks in on me. It was the distasteful appearance of my meal that made me instantly full. After 5 mouthfuls I just threw it in the bin. They sure lost me as a customer with no fault on their part; just a girl faking class before she makes it.

I write this recollection as I lounge on my coach supposedly working from home. I am giving myself the much deserved rest because when work comes, it will demand every ounce of my energy and I have had to learn that it is equally as important to schedule rest and not just take it when you have the time. I will also schedule time for love because the effort I put in my work is not transferred to my compatible other. We don’t want jack to be a dull boy do we? 😉

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The one book you should read

I interrupt normal programming to introduce this gem. Normally, I would have a post out at this time of the year about how I travelled in books in 2020 but this, my last book of 2020 and first of 2021 deserves an accolade. It did in fact get one, voted the best fiction in 2020 by goodreads. Avid readers who have experienced different writing styles, varying length of pages and ideologies sat down, read and 72,828 people took their time to vote it in for the award. Numbers do not lie, and that’s the premise on which I dared look for this book and much as I am late to the voting, I am and you will agree with the 72,828.

It is everything you want to read and just the right dose before diminishing marginal returns

mashkiz

There are so many things to love about this book. The cover, the simple writing style, the length of pages, science fiction here and there, the theme, the characters, the arrangement of chapters, the titles of the chapters, it is somehow a self-help book; it is a bit of everything and it being categorized as the best fiction is putting it in a neat box. I had trouble placing it in one genre, it is everything you want to read and just the right dose before diminishing marginal returns.

Writing this review reminds me of that incident in the Bible when Jesus asks John to baptize him and John is quite reluctant because he feels he is not worthy enough and in any case, it should be Jesus baptizing him. I fear putting my version of the book incase it turns out not to be your cup of tea and you end up dismissing the entire book. I hope you can tell how much I really want you to read this book. If it takes you a whole year to finish, let it be so. I am confident that would not be the case and I would very much like feedback if you happen to think it was a waste of your time.

Every life contains millions of decisions. Some big, some small. But every time one decision is taken over another, the outcomes differ. An irreversible variation occurs which in turn leads to further variations. This is what Nora Seed experiences in the book. She is hopeless in life, pondering what could have been if she did something different but where she stands, death is her only option. She commits suicide, only to find herself in a library that gives her the possibility to experience all the versions of her life that could have been.

Phrases like the good old days, take me back, wishful thinking, building castles in the air; always wishing for the past or imagining a better future. Nora realizes that the present has as much potential as the past did or the future will have. Life is not for understanding, it is just for living. Sometimes the universe does conspire to help us achieve our goals and sometimes life simply gave you a whole new perspective by waiting around long enough for you to see it.

While going through the parallel universe, she realizes that there is little that is unique or special about our problems. Maybe it not the lack of achieving that makes us upset but the expectation to achieve. You can have everything and feel nothing. It is not what you look at that matters, it is what you see, perception is everything!

If you are not convinced this is the one book you should read, my goal is still achieved as I have managed to sneak several quotes from the book. I’ll leave you with this other one that should have been in the book but happened to be in another. Unless we change how we view ourselves, what we are and what we are not, we cannot change. Don’t find yourself, never know who you are because that’s what keeps you striving and discovering.

Having come this far, I’ll dare recommend a song to listen to: it only takes one night- Zepeda Gonzalez Victoria. For some reason, it came to my head the moment I finished the book.

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You don’t know everything

After watching Queen’s Gambit, many were impressed by chess and Hammond’s prowess in mastering the game. Doing something exceptionally well that you love and earns you money is what got to me. I am nowhere close to earning money from pool but beating men in a game most think they are better players is part of the thrill like it was for Hammond.

There may be versions but I only know of one game. We arrange the balls on the triangle and then break the game. The player who shoots a ball in one of the 6 holes determines which of the two balls will be theirs. There are striped and spotted balls. You use a white ball to hit the rest and the black ball should be the last one in.

One afternoon, I walked to a pool table and I wanted to teach my mum the little I know so that I could play with her but instead, she asked a friend’s son to teach me how to play. I was quite offended, teach me! I know the game. I took it in stride as he explained and the deeper he went, the more I learnt that I did not know everything. What I hated most was that he thought he was doing me a favour playing girl like and going slow on me. I told him I prefer learning the hard way and he should bring his A game on. Every time he would fail to score a shot or miss the ball he would claim he was doing it purposely to give me an upper hand much as I had made it clear I did not need one.

Well, he was a better player than I was but nonetheless he wasn’t beyond reproach. He was like the janitor who taught Hammond how to play but eventually she learnt the ropes and became a better player leaving the janitor in awe. I have to give my teacher props for encouraging me along the way. He kept saying nice shot, you have 3 options even though I saw one. Do not worry so much about getting the ball in a particular hole, it does not have to get in the hole closest to it. Focus more on positioning the balls rather than having a direct shot in the holes. Watch the game closely to know when you have 2 chances but never inform the other player when you make a mistake that gives them two chances if they were not keen enough to notice.

On that table, I learnt that I need to work with the upper hand the world wants to give me instead of learning the hard way all the time. One gets more joy knowing they played fair and square and won than knowing you had an advantage that put you on the same level as the other experienced player and based on that new level ground you won. I guess this stems from the phrase hammered in our heads, started from the bottom now you here. We have become so obsessed to start from the bottom because that is the only way we know. If someone stretches out their hand for us we get defensive and put our guard up and ask who said I needed that. You obviously don’t but you also don’t need the struggle at the bottom to prove your way to the top. In 2021 may you become less defensive and recognize the helping hand. Take it, you both are on the same team that just wants to see you up and it is not bad to use a ladder instead of going round to find the stair case.

Later in the day, I had a chance to play a different player. He was quite reluctant wasting his precious time playing a learner. I encouraged him to take the cue stick. First, he didn’t know how to arrange the balls on the triangle. I had learnt a few minutes before and I was happy to show him. I got a striped ball in while opening and my luck ran with it. I had one ball left when he had 6 to go! I felt like calling my teacher who was nearby to see what a good student I was but I knew that would emasculate the guy I talked into playing. His friend asked me whether I was sure that was my first time playing pool because my grip on the cue stick looked mastered. I insisted it was though at the back of my mind I knew no one learns that fast.

My opponent caught up with me in the race for the black ball. That’s the thing with pool, you might have a head start but that never means it is a sure indication that you have won the race. Pretty much how life is as well. On my shot, I placed the black ball right at the mouth of the hole. I felt bad that it was my skill that positioned it well yet he would get all the glory of being the winner. The question will be who won A or B with no explanation as to how. It was such an impossible shot to miss but he did!! How life brings a plot twist every so often.. haha. I went in for the kill. Forceful enough to get the black ball in while being cautious that the white does not follow through.

This reminds me of a rule I disagreed with my teacher on. Getting the white ball in any of the holes is a foul that gives the opponent player two shots at the game. While we were both aiming for the black ball, he got both the black and white ball in. I argued that we could not crown him a winner because while at it he had broken a rule. He claimed that despite the foul, the winner is the one who gets the black ball in first; anyone who sees my point?

Much as my teacher did not admit, for a minute he pondered on my challenge and I was happy to have given him food for thought. Remember, You do not know everything, so be teachable. Also, notice when a helping hand is stretched your way and take it. Don’t kill yourself trying to start from the bottom.

Happy 2021!

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Rook

It’s been less than a year

11 months to be precise

I didn’t see it coming

Thought I was finally settled, closing that chapter with you for good

You were easy to love, the center of my conversations.

Yesterday, I realized something was wrong. It was too late for me to do anything about it. In the morning, I woke up ready to release you but you released me.

Some things are not meant to last forever, much as we want them to. All we can do is constantly create an environment for ourselves that makes them continually choose to be part of it.

I am grateful for the moments you chose to share with me and how long or short that was.

Rook, you left too soon but thank you for letting me have you, for letting me know you, for letting me love you.

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66 books in 366 days

Yes, I am also in awe!! I did it and you too can. The journey was one of progress over perfection. There were days I was too lazy or in the wrong mindspace but each week, I had to compensate the readings for the days I had skipped. My intention was to begin each week on a clean slate. I would not carry missed readings of a previous week onto the next. Also, I only read the Bible when I could internalize it and be present in my reading. You must have been thinking I literally read 66 books gotya!

I had an accountability partner who was interested in my reading journey. I would tell him if I came across something interesting and because he is also on his journey, and happens to own a study Bible, he would tell me the explanation given on that particular text. Thereafter, we would each add our own input. I am so excited about this that I am writing a draft in September because I am quite sure I will finish my Bible reading. Also, I just finished a text whose story I would like to share before I downplay the details when recalling 3 months from now.

I will definitely share this sometime in December to convince you to take this journey come 2021. The good thing is that there is a link that caters for your needs. You could choose whether you want to read it theme by theme, related stories together, sequentially or one book in the old testament and another in the New testament. I chose related stories together so that I can see the references made through the entire Bible as one sequence. An example would be reading about a battle David fought in the book of Kings and relating it with the song he composed after his loss or win in the book of Psalms. This reading kept me in the moment. It was as if I was watching the events unfolding. Here’s the link https://www.biblestudytools.com/bible-reading-plan/ and those who need a planned Bible for this journey, one is available at Keswick Bookshop. The Kenyan branch I know of is at Prestige Plaza.

I am picking up the writing in December and true to my word, I am days away from finishing my Bible reading journey. I am very proud of this milestone and I will be taking it up again come next year. I came across interesting stories that are not told and some facts that have been misrepresented. Also, the book needs to be studied as there are various interpretations by scholars that shed light and some juicy back stories.

The book of Acts captivated me. It is based on Paul, his travels, his teachings and tribulations. Paul was accused and brought before the King because some people opposed his way of teaching. Every time he was put on trial, the ruler did not find what exact crime he was being accused of but his accusers wanted him punished by death nonetheless. He was in Prison for more than 2 years and different Kings heard his case. Somewhere in the middle of the book, there is a story about one night when Paul was preaching till past midnight and a man was dozing off. Eventually, the man lost the battle and slept only for him to fall down from the third storey of the building. The other believers present rushed to his aid but unfortunately he was dead. Paul took him to a room and stretched his body on top of him and the man was brought back to life. This is a funny way to die. I can only imagine the words exchanged by Paul and the man once he is brought back to life. This is great fodder for a skit!

The book of Jonah has become one of my favorites. We often hear about prophecies but the book of Jonah focused on the prophet. It reminds me that prophets were human despite the supernatural things happening to them like being fed by ravens. Jonah was quite stubborn and rightly so. He explained that he knew the Lord was patient and forgiving. He therefore saw no need for him to go to Nineveh and warn the people about a destruction upon them yet he knew once they repented that would not come to pass and his journey would have been in vain. I wonder what would have happened if he had chosen another means of transport. Might he have been swallowed by a bird? I guess we will never know but that is parody potential. I found it funny that while in the fish’s stomach, Jonah prayed for the Lord to save him and keep him alive but once he was out, having delivered his message and realizing that the Lord will not punish Nineveh he says I would rather die than watch this!

My accountability partner shared great insights about the book with me. From his perspective, the writing poses questions to us on whether we are okay with the fact that the Lord loves and is willing to forgive our enemies. He said the book is like a mirror to anyone who reads it. In Jonah we see the worst parts of our own characters magnified and it shows how the Lord puts up with the Jonah in us. I agree with him because I would have had the same reaction as Jonah.

Another story I loved was that of the shrewd manager in the book of Luke. The story is concluded by these words: “ My disciples, I tell you to use wicked wealth to make friends for yourselves then when it is gone you will be welcomed into an internal home. If you cannot be trusted with wicked wealth who will trust you with true wealth” The study Bible explained that this passage was to inform us to make wise use of financial opportunities we have not to earn heaven but to help people find Christ. I still do not know the difference between earning heaven and helping people find Christ hence why I will have to reread and probably get guidance.

I like how the Bible is a collection of stories, how the gospels are written during the same time frame but from different perspectives. I like how it has a subtle back and forth nature in terms of prophecies and what comes to pass, I like how the story is just not in prose, there are songs, poems, letters… I like the fact that you just don’t get it right off the bat and how scholars have taken time to study texts and theologians go to school to learn the same. I like how one has to study the different people who wrote the different books to understand the times and the nature of the writing. Most of all, I like how amused I got when something finally clicked. I like how you are considering taking this journey come next year.

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Reflections

sourced from instagram

If anything, 2020 has given me the opportunity to have lots of self reflection. There are some habits that I identified and I have been trying to do away with. I know it is work in progress but sometimes I get vexed because I am not progressing fast enough. It has definitely not taken me 21 days as promised. At times it feels like I take one step forward and two back. I try being patient in the process because if I had it all figured out then what would be the point of life?

We all know we should not compare ourselves but we often do it. You look at your life and acknowledge you are doing better or could be doing better. It gets to a point that someone else’s good news is good for them but it would have been nice if it were you. Bishop used to say that if your neighbour is receiving blessings, prepare your basket because you are next; the Lord is in your vicinity. This has helped me often genuinely celebrate my friends successes and this year especially they have been plenty. It is better when your circle succeeds because birds of a feather…

Being more self aware, I can call myself out when I exude behaviour that is contrary to what I am cultivating. Much as at times I am frustrated when I just can’t stop altogether; the little voice assures me that noticing the problem in and of itself is progress. When one knows they are on the wrong and it gets pointed out the person is not on the same path as another who cannot identify the wrong in the situation.

Part of this journey has also been being my own person who is accountable for what I say and do. The sweeping statements that we make personalising general situations is us manifesting those situations. You know how everybody alludes to Nairobi being one big bedroom, men being trash, 2020 being the worst year and all other phrases that have become socially acceptable, do not say it if you have not experienced it. If 2020 was the much needed break that worked in your favour, own it! If you had a relationship that was more towards character development than whatever you aspired, it does not make men trash. If all Nairobi is for you is twitter banter that takes up your time scrolling through KOT comments that is what you should say.

For the longest time, the conditioning that took place was that you had to side with other people and own whatever they were experiencing as your own for you to be identified as one of them or just for your peace of mind. I remember in school we had lots of such sweeping statements: For starters we all had to admit not to be prepared for exams or not to have read over the holidays even when tuition was forced on you during the 4 weeks.

I miss out on so many things in life because I always want to make the right choice. Even Dettol only gets 99% but I am the high achiever. By the time I have exhausted the pros and cons, judged myself on behalf of everyone else, I definitely do not take the leap. I want to learn that it is not about getting it right all the time, most of the time, but going for … ( Haven’t filled the blanks yet) still thinking of the right word.

I perfect my ability to make the right choices by gambling on this unpredictable Nairobi weather. After looking at the clouds and the weather forecast, I decide my attire for the day. There are days after choosing to dress warm, the sun bakes me proper and I tell myself I shouldn’t have dressed warm. Other days it is quite the contrary and I freeze myself to death; there is nothing like freeze and shine. You would think I would have already learnt that things do not go according to plan and that signs are not 100% accurate but I haven’t. Dressing in layers that I could build up or remove an item depending on how the weather changes is a pretty sound option. I am learning to always look out for the third option; be like that flower that stubbornly grows despite the hindrances and blooms.

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Heaven visiting hours

Wouldn’t it be nice

seeing our loved ones who’ve gone ahead of us

Just for an hour

I know its not enough but I would take that

Going through each day remembering what they loved, what they could have said, how things could be different and much as it hurts, It is one day closer to meeting them.

I don’t fear death, I have people waiting on the other side, It would be lonely if I had no one.

I am scared thinking of it as heaven and Hell. I would rather have it as a waiting room. You know how waiting rooms either have background music, a screen distracting you and probably a machine calling out ticket numbers. Some waiting rooms have a water dispenser, It is really important to get hydrated.

Much as I cannot visit you, I do believe you visit me every so often.

Just yesterday, you came through for me and It was so evident I could not miss noticing that was you.

Candles on a cake would have been much better but I light you vanilla and sandalwood, I hope you like the fragrance as much as I do.

Happy 35th Night.

Even if it goes off, you still light up my world.
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