Not dropping the ball

It is easy for me to write book reviews because I am always reading even when busy. It is quite a shock that even in months that come hard at me I still manage to read. This month, I have read 4 books that I could write about but I really wanted a different kind of post. I have been working on a very introspective post being my birth month but it went off tangent and I cannot salvage the bits of me left.

June 2022 has been very peculiar. It feels like a roller coaster and when the ride slows and I can finally catch my breath, someone opens sprinklers with ice-cold water and I am wondering whether it is refreshingly cold because my heart was just about to escape my chest or whether I am experiencing hypothermia and the fight for my life is not yet over.

Since the inception of the blog in August 2019 I have never missed posting each month and June 2022 is not about to be the exception. It takes the hand of God for me to push that publish button because the writing no longer remains private. No vision board could have predicted my starting a blog but either way I still beat myself up because I do not have one; a vision board that is.

I have heard people talk of their dream jobs and I tried picturing what that is for me. I could not name a particular company but thought of attributes I would want it to have. I want a job that is fulfilling and engages me. It should also have those tasks that I can easily carry out on those less productive days. I want a job that has travel opportunities or one that will pay me enough to organize the travel on my own. I should be able to detach from work during leave days and the weekend because personal time is respected.

I want a job that is interested in training its people to ensure they are all-rounded and gives them the opportunity to relate. I want good healthcare insurance but mostly a job that will not contribute to me developing any health problems. It will be a bonus if I do not dread Mondays. My dream job is not limited to employment, I am open to any money-making venture that will have those attributes.

My Linked In has been ablaze with my peers announcing the start of their careers and yet for me it feels like I am juggling and I am barely holding onto one aspect of my life before I have to hold onto another that is slipping. It is not really juggling but more of participating in a sport whose task is to carry a pale of water using strings and the art is controlling the tension of the strings as this will help you safely pour the water collected into the empty bottle. Throughout the exercise there is a lot of shifting and figuring things out. This was an activity we did for team building earlier in the year.

I have lots of time. I have been binging Orange is the New Black every day and night for a week now. I take breaks in between and spend an unhealthy amount of time scrolling my phone as I move from whatsaap, pinterest, instagram and twitter. Whenever I try muster the energy to do something productive like studying french or resuming my online courses so that I can explain the gap in my CV and have something more to bring to the table, I convince myself that bingeing is a worthy cause and that I do not have to be constantly productive.

June 2022 has really shaped my adult life. I have enjoyed a week-long solitude and realized that I do not have to travel outside the country to discover myself. In today’s session, we realized that I have a cavity and I was instructed to keep monitoring my tooth. I am currently not in pain and it is not posing a risk so we decided to leave the tooth. I am encouraged to find out how other people are managing their cavities.

June 2022 brought my nearest and dearest back to the fold. I am always in awe of the beautiful friendships I have been able to nurture along the way including one with my mother. Like the man in the picture, I am not dropping the ball.